I would like to say that this is the last blog post that I write about Haiti, but I am not sure that is true.
We arrived back in Florida on a Saturday night. Since it had been such a late night, I slept in the next morning and missed church. When I finally made it out of bed and into my living room, I turned on my computer to start updating myself on everyone’s lives and turned the TV on for some background noise. My television is usually on the Food Network or HGTV if I am just looking for noise, so House Hunters was the show that came on. I wasn’t really listening to the show, but I overheard the woman who was ‘house hunting’ say that she wasn’t sure about the house because the bedrooms were too close together. I was absolutely disgusted and it only got worse!
The show soon went to commercial and an advertisement for Red Lobster soon filled the screen. Guess what time of year it was? Lobster Fest! Across the country we were celebrating the overabundance of (expensive) food! It was more than I could handle. I don’t think I was ready for the dichotomy between being in a place where people have no idea where their next meal will come from and being in a place where we actually celebrate that we have more food than we can eat.
As I have mentioned before, I work in the education field. This means that just about everything is viewed through the lens of being a ‘learning experience’. For the month since I have been back in the US, I have been trying to figure out what the lesson of Haiti is for me. How has spending a week in Haiti changed the way I live here?
I recently read a quote on another blog from a book that I think perfectly summarizes one of the most tangible differences I have noticed.
“There’s something about the desperation of life here (in Haiti) that resonates with how desperate life itself really actually, is. On the surface, an American suburb is a place where life is orderly, manicured, manageable. Here, the surface is raw and needy and clawing. There is some reassurance in living where the exterior life, with all its ragged desperation – and glimpses of beauty and faith and spontaneous dancing – resonates more with the interior experience of being human.” “Following Jesus Through the Eye of the Needle” by Kent Annan.
Do you ever feel like you are living a fake life? Pretending like you have it all together when you are this close to falling apart completely? I know that I do! As Annan says, there is something so reassuring about living authentically.
Over the past eight years, I think I have let diabetes control my life more than I should have. I let it control my thoughts, my feelings, and my behaviors. I have let it guide how I feel about myself and the activities that I participate in. But you know what?
There are diabetics climbing Mt Everest, participating in the Olympic games, getting married, and having babies all the time. Sure, it takes a little extra effort, but I am done letting diabetes stop me from doing the things I want to do in my life.